Making the Choice to Homeschool Your Child

It's one of your worst nightmares as a parent who wants their child to be successful - Your child with Epilepsy says they can no longer go to school because they have too many seizures while they are there. This situation may seem all too convenient. It may seem like another way to get out of doing homework or get out of having to be up at 6:00am each morning. But in reality, one must think of the many, many legitimate reasons in which a child with Epilepsy should be homeschooled.

Maybe your child isn't the one who wants this change. Maybe it's you who wants your child on homebound, or it could be the principal of the school. Whatever the situation, you're stuck with a choice to make and you don't know what to do. I'm hoping that this blog can give you a little bit of insight from a person with Epilepsy who was on homebound, and help you make your choice.
 
- Many schools use fluorescent lights. Many people's Epilepsy is "Photosensitive," and lights of several sorts are a trigger - Especially fluorescent lighting. Even being in contact with this type of lighting for an hour can be far too much for someone to stand. For example, I could only make it to third period before a seizure struck me. This led to my 5 years of homebound high school!

- Opportunities to get hurt are everywhere in a school. You rarely find carpet, or any sort of soft place to land. Some schools are not even equipped with elevators, and stairs are the only option to get to a nurse's office. Your child can fall out of his/her chair, hit the hard floor and hurt themselves very badly. At home there are several soft places to land, but school is an entirely different situation.

- Studying stresses the brain. Whether it be those crazy Algebra problems, or that project in Physics that has your child's brain under a great amount of pressure. You'd be surprised what a "simple" English essay can do to someone's brain! I, myself, had most of my seizures in school during things as simple as pop quizzes. Maybe your child is feeling just as stressed as I was.

- Pressure from other children. Of course, everyone has to get used to other human beings. After all, their future jobs will require interacting with other people. It's absolutely necessary. However, people can be quite harsh during high school years. Not to mention how harsh they can be to kids with disabilities. All that stress can definitely lead to your child having more seizures, and even panic attacks or depression. It is important to keep your child stress free as much as possible to avoid unwanted seizures. (As if any of them are wanted!)

- Medication schedule - Many children are on a strict medication schedule, and the schools can make it quite hard on your children. I can't tell you all how many times my high school "forgot" to mention that I was running out of medication, leading to me having seizures from lack of medication. Either that, or having to call my father and make him drive half an hour to bring me back-up medication. God forbid I ever kept some back-up in my purse... The school police would have no problem arresting a child for something like that!

- Emergencies - Seizures happen, and they happen when we least expect them to. You're at work or at home, and your child has fallen and is convulsing during PE class. It will take twenty minutes for you to arrive, and by that time the school nurse will have freaked out so much that they have called an ambulance. That's another huge medical bill that could have been prevented with an emergency anticonvulsant. You would think being a school nurse, you would know how to care for a seizure patient... But that is hardly the case these days.

- "Mom, I'm not feeling good." - You probably get these calls quite a lot. While you're at work. Taking a nap on the couch. Out grocery shopping. Or 30 minutes before the school day is over. Your kid wants you to come pick them up because they simply cannot last one more minute. Think of all the gas wasted, and think of how often you're doing this.

As unpleasant as this all sounds, it's unfortunately true. If you said "That's my child!" after reading at least 3 of the sections above, it may be a good time to recommend or consider homebound/ home schooling. Your child may have been the first to mention it, or maybe the school has called and recommended it to you. Maybe you've been thinking of it yourself in the back of your head. Nonetheless, it's probably not a bad thing to consider if your situation fits the criteria below.

- More than one seizure a day, no matter what type it may be.

- Grand mal seizures are a regular occurrence. (Once a week, once a month.)

- Seizures come without warning, or at different times. (Not expected.)

- Not many people know how to care for your child's specific type of seizure.

- One or both parents work from home, or have the option to be home during the weekdays.

- Your child's school offers a disability homebound program. Be sure to call your district and ask about this, as not many of the high schools actually know about it unless they have a student participating in the program.

- Your child's seizures are so bad that he/she cannot take care of themselves.

- Your child suffers from other side effects to their Epilepsy such as depression, stomach disorders/problems, migraines, etc. that come and go without warning.

- Your child's seizures are worse during the week and/or when they get less sleep.

Your child may not like this decision. Being away from their friends isn't exactly what every teen wants. However, remind them that they can always see their friends on the weekends, and make it an effort to make sure that happens. Let them know that Fridays and Saturdays are open for their friends as long as homework is finished. Help them understand that you cannot afford for them to be severely hurt. They may not understand at first, but after a while they will begin to understand that homeschooling may be a better choice. Your child's seizures may diminish greatly with more sleep, and the lack of the stressors of high school.

Do you think your child is ready? Follow the steps below to get started:

1. Have a family meeting. Make a special dinner, and sit down with your spouse and your child together (without the other siblings) and explain what you have been thinking of, and why it might benefit. You can even let them read this blog if you feel that it will help!

2. Give your child a few days to think about it. Let them know that you only mean best by wanting to make this decision.

3. While your child is thinking, contact your school district health department and ask about their homeschooling/homebound programs, if any. If they claim they do not offer any, ask them about what schools may offer these programs in your area. Since there are disabled children everywhere, there is at least one program like this in each city. Many in which the teachers will come to your home, rather than you having to teach your child. Some schools simply send you the work in the mail. It depends on your district.

4. Talk to your child again with your spouse, once you have gathered all your information. Set up a meeting with the district/principal and talk about it together with them as well. This will help your child understand that this is not all the end of the world. I thought the same thing when I was young, but I quickly learned what amazing things only an extra hour of sleep could do for my health. I don't regret being homebound one bit. The best thing my father ever did for me.

5. Make a bargain. Think of some sort of reward for your child if they participate in this program without hesitation. Maybe offer them a $30 gift card to that store they love if they do well each quarter. This will let your child know that you really have them in mind, and that you're not trying to "ruin their lives," like us teenagers seem to think sometimes.

6. Work out a schedule. Most programs require one parent to be home for safety reasons, but other guardians are usually allowed. If the child has an aunt/uncle/grandmother/grandfather who doesn't work and can be home during the child's schooling hours, arrange for them to be home at those times. The whole point of this program is to increase the child's safety. If no one is home to watch him/her, there is no point in having them on homebound.

7. Stick to the schedule, and update it regularly. Doctors appointments come up, and seizures do too. Always inform homeschool teachers if your child is feeling sick at least one day in advance so they know that there might be a sick day tomorrow, or that a doctors appointment is coming up soon and rescheduling is needed. Although your child is on homebound/homeschool, absences usually need to be made up. This is a must for high school children. Middle schools are usually more lenient with sick days.

8. Make it fun. Of course you want your child to rest more, but if possible, take your child out for lunch once in a while. Make sure they still have things to preoccupy themselves when they are not busy. Maybe help them pick up a new hobby like painting, sewing, drawing, yoga, etc. But always may sure they are safe.

9. Help your child stay on top of their studies. You can always buy a calendar and put an "X" over each day when their homework is finished.

My experiences with homebound were not all great - Mostly at first. Eventually I settled in, realized how great it was to get more rest, and as the seizures slowly went away I learned to appreciate my father's choice. I still saw my friends on weekends, and the only difference between myself and other kids was that I didn't see my friends EVERYDAY. And let me tell you... seeing friends every single day was quite overrated. I picked up my art at home and finished more pieces than I've ever finished in one year.

My teachers were wonderful. They came right to the house, so I never had to get up and go anywhere. All my work was done at the kitchen table, and after two hours I was finished for the entire week. I had homework, but it was very little. I had access to my teacher's help via e-mail and phone throughout the week if I ever ran into problems, so it was definitely more one-on-one and I learned a lot more than I did being in regular high school. I don't regret a thing!

We saved money on unneeded hospital bills. No 911 calls that were not needed. My father was able to dispense my emergency medication and put me to bed; Both eliminating the seizure, and avoiding a hospital stay. If I ever really needed to go to the hospital bill, I simply got in my father's truck and he took me. No more absences due to doctor's visits. All I had to do was schedule my classes around those times. Easy as 1,2,3! Of course it isn't always that easy, but it's far easier than what it would have been like in school full time.

Good luck to all of you making the choice, and I hope my information has helped you all somewhat! If you have any questions just comment below!

Helpful Links

www.connectionsacademy.com

www.k12.com

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