Some say it's the month of miracles. Others say it's the season of giving. Maybe December is all about the holidays and spending time with family. Everyone has their different ideas of what December is all about, but here's mine.
Let's reflect on our past year, shall we? Let us think of all the things we've been through. Every battle we've conquered, and all the battles we are still fighting. Let's think of those we have helped, and those that have helped us. What about our wrongdoings? What have we done wrong, and how have we changed from the consequences of those faux pas? What is better, and what is worse?
These are the things I think about when December rolls around. I start to see the gifts as they sit underneath the tree, and they remind me of the gifts that I have forgotten to thank the Lord for. So many times in life we will fail to do so. Often we get so wrapped up in finding the perfect gifts for our loved ones, and we forget to thank the Lord FOR our loved ones!
Today my boyfriend came over for our own little "Christmas". It's only the 23rd, but we cannot be with each other Christmas Eve or Christmas, so we decided to give our gifts early. Gifts, for some reason, seem to be so very important around Christmas time. I spent weeks and weeks wracking my brains out trying to find the perfect gift for him. I ended up spending paycheck after paycheck to purchase him a ring with my name and his name engraved on the inside, a bottle of the world's most expensive cologne ( Seriously! What is up with cologne prices these days?), an expensive aviator's watch, two "love coupon books", and a small photo album filled with pictures from our year together. After all, a year ago on the 18th of December was the day we came together as a couple. I wanted it to be special.
What did he get me? A pink bathrobe. Yes, a bathrobe. It cost him $17.99, and to me, it didn't have much thought involved. I tried it on, and it was very comfy. I certainly needed a new one, so this gift of his wasn't an entire waste. I can't lie... I was a little bit (a lot) disappointed to only have received a bathrobe for our one year anniversary/Christmas gift. But then on the phone, as I hid my disappointment, he explained to me the meaning behind the gift. He said that whenever he is gone, and we cannot see each other for long amounts of time, I can always have his arms around me when I wear that bathrobe.
I immediately felt stupid for being upset that I didn't get a promise ring, or something that sparkled. I immediately felt selfish for expecting more out of him. I also felt ridiculous for spending so much money on him! (Shhhhh... Don't tell him that!). I am glad that he liked his gifts, though... And it made me feel happy inside to see that. Something about making others smile makes me smile as well. We spent the rest of the night sharing some of the cutest kisses on the nose and cheeks that anyone could ever experience, and my Christmas became Christmas.
My boyfriend and I... Well, we've been through some tough times this month. There has been a lot of tears, a lot of doubt, and a lot of pain. The future scares us. Being apart from one another kills us. But somehow, Christmas brought us tons of miracles. The miracle of peace - No more arguing or disagreements. The miracle of joy - No sadness, and no worries about the future. The miracle of hope - Hope that everything will be okay. There's no longer anything to worry about. The Lord has taken the wheel of our lives. And most of all, the miracle of LOVE - After feeling like we were too gone to save, the Lord answered our prayers and we fell in love all over again... Just like we did a year ago.
My health hasn't been so great either. As many of you know via Twitter, Facebook, or just from the blog, my seizures have been coming back. They haven't just come back a little bit, but viciously. Things were getting to the point that I hardly wanted to roll out of bed. I just wanted to sleep and get as much rest as possible. With seizures comes depression, because your brain just can't function correctly. With depression comes outbursts and hurtful words and actions. Things can become a mess.
I wont get into too much detail, as I usually do... but the Lord really saved the season for me. My seizures quieted down enough for me to sit through the Trans-Siberian Orchestra's Christmas Show. This is something that has been on my "To-Do Before You Die" list since I was in middle school. The most amazing show I have EVER seen! The light show was absolutely seizure-iffic and I'm surprised I didn't fall down into a Tonic-Clonic right then and there, but I was fine! I closed my eyes for several parts, and suffered several simple partials. But for me, simple partials are nothing, and I enjoyed myself completely.
It's just now beginning to be Christmas Eve, and I can't imagine what other miracles and gifts that the Lord has in store. But I have taken a while to look around me and thank Him for the ones I've already been given. It's so very easy to overlook the blessing of simply having a bed to sleep on, or a roof over our heads. So take some time and try to think of 100 blessings that you have been given this past year, and then get down on your knees and thank our dear heavenly Father for anything we have failed to acknowledge.
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Before I go, I would appreciate if you could all take just a minute and vote for this sweet little angel named Idalya Estevez. She is just a little girl, but she is suffering from Leukemia, which is a battle that even the strongest man would find near impossible. But let me tell you something - this little angel is still smiling through it all. Through each hospital visit, and losing her beautiful curls, she continues to smile and show the world that there is always hope.
I have nominated her for TG Bear's "Person of the Month" contest, so that she may have a teddy bear to hug when times are hard. She can have her very own friend to take wherever she goes. To the doctor's office, which is often scary for children... Or to the hospital, which scares even adults like myself. Maybe she just needs a teddy bear to hold at night when she lays her head to sleep. A teddy bear to calm her fears and pain.
Please also say a prayer for this little angel, so that she may be healthy once again and live a fruitful life in the Lord!
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Mandy~ I have seizures as you do. I am always afraid that I am so humiliating that those closest to me will exit quietly. I discovered that I tend to go WAY over the top when it's gift time. Not only do I spend far too much, I also drive myself crazy making sure EACH gift has a deep and intimate MEANING to that person. It's EXHAUSTING. But, so often in life, if we simply look and listen, we learn life's Keep it Simple lessons at the most UNEXPECTED times. Wear that Pink Robe as often as you can!!!! XO,CC
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